Tantrums, Standards, and Mafia Hits


Give it your best shot, baby. Let it all out.

Usually my own tantrums occur during the editing process of something about to go live. But here’s what I’ve learned: nothing will ever be good enough. It won’t. My hardest critic is changing and growing as are her experiences and opinions. You guessed it, she is me, and I are never satisfied. That is the only thing that has never changed.

Standards, now, that’s a whole other ball of wax. I have found that flexibility in the establishing of standards has been a transformative gift to myself.  Standards, for me this year, have had less to do with what other people think and more to do with myself, my family, and what I believe to be my God-given purpose in this world. When I feel selfish for putting myself first, I remind myself that my children are watching and learning how to be an adult from my example. So, when they see me struggling to meet the criteria of doing only things that make a difference in the world, they get it. Hopefully they will inherit this standard from me. In the words of Point of Grace’s ‘Turn Up The Music’, ‘It’s not who you knew, and it’s not what you did, it’s how you live.’ 

Here’s another thing about tantrums … sometimes you may feel like you’ve been cut off at the knees by something said about your work or about how you’ve chosen to represent yourself out there in the world. So, you tantrum. That’s fine. Get it all out. Once you pull your head out of the paper bag and wipe the snot from your chin, hopefully you’ll have the presence of mind to see that a good knee-chopping is sometimes simply valuable editing that really needed to be done … you were just too close to see it.

Oh, and as for the mafia hit on your knees —taking the metaphor one step further — don’t be surprised to find that instead of needing a wheelchair to get around going forward … you just might find yourself the new owner of a tiny set of wings.

Screen Shot 2013-08-25 at 5.13.12 PM


About Catherine Cabanela

BuddyTV Writer with an MBA in marketing and an undergraduate in writing and foreign language, I spend my time writing, tweeting, aggressively pursuing new social media strategies, writing, co-parenting twins with my husband, and reading everything I can get my hands on. All at the same time. Oh, and writing. Former ScreenSpy Critic for Bones, Revenge, Covert Affairs, and Motive. Fiction: "The When and the How: A Bone To Pick" http://bit.ly/BONESFic
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