#Bones ‘The High in the Low’ Review: Some Have Greatness Thrust Upon Them

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This week’s Bones episode,“The High in the Low,” gave viewers a truly scrummy conundrum to chew on. Real life, we are reminded, is unscripted. Real life is lived in the in-between spaces where who we are, who we will become, is defined by the choices we make.

Our eventual choices–how we choose to answer life’s most confronting questions–are unpredictable without foreknowledge of the variables and circumstances under which we will face them, as Brennan, ever the realist, has said many times.

The Bones crew tackled one of these defining questions this week and everyone took a stand, even though some of those stands were hard to take. The beauty of this episode is in the steadfast friendship and support the Avengers surround Wendell with. In the end we see a creative solution brought about by Booth’s resourcefulness and determination and Caroline’s expertise.  Though Deschanel’s Brennan and Taylor’s Cam were spot-on in their compassionate portrayals, the greatness was brought to this episode in David Boreanaz’s Booth and Michael Grant Terry’s Wendell. More on this later.

Abby ‘Doobie Dealer’ Briggs, a straight-laced art student who risked her own life to help others regain lost vitality paid the ultimate price when she refused to sell medical marijuana to a recreational user and dealer. Her case ushers in the controversial issue of legalizing the use of medical cannabis, and polarizes the Jeffersonian team members when the stands they each take have real life implications.

Beloved Bones squintern and recently diagnosed cancer warrior, Wendell ‘I-Love-The-Smell-Of-Science-In-The-Morning’ Bray, returns to the Jeffersonian ruddy-skinned, baggy-eyed, and naked noggin-ed after several rounds of intense chemotherapy and radiation, the side affects of which are/were brutal. Everyone is thrilled to see him, including Brennan who is particularly sweet and hopeful in her support of him. He appears in good humor, taking his disease in stride as well as anyone could in his position. Concerned that his colleagues might question his ability to perform his duties, he insists they treat him no differently, and jumps right in with his characteristically astute observations in regard to the remains.

<<Related: Our Bones Article & Review Archive here!>>

Remember the good old days when Angela’s Matrix-like Angelator would project a rotating simulation inside an enormous holographic cube of streaming green numbers? Well, happy days are here again!  Angela has a fancy new high-tech toy called the Three-dimensional Holographic Emulation Outlet, or THEO for short, which Cam immediately falls in love with when it reconstructs the badly ravaged skull and identifies the victim. Unfortunately, we only get to see Theo once, this episode, but perhaps he’ll be back to help catch the Ghost Killer in an upcoming episode.

Wendell and Jack

Wendell and Hodgins in the lab at the Jeffersonian.

By the way, Dr. Jack ‘The-Pied-Piper-Of-Termites’ Hodgins wows Wendell with his rudimentary method of extracting horned-up termites from bones using a plastic tube and a line of black ballpoint pen ink which is just as impressive as Angela’s new buddy, Theo.  #JustSayin

As the case unfolds in “The High in the Low,” Brennan and Booth discover that Abby, having experienced debilitating pain from lupus, had been prescribed medicinal cannabis by her physician and referred to Dr. Richard ‘Stinkin-Adorable-In-A-Suit’ Burke (Larry Sullivan) at Full Health Wellness Center who filled the prescription which she reported gave her her life back. So moved was Abby by her improved health that she became a fierce advocate, wrote many articles on the medicinal properties of ganga and began working at the wellness center dispensary to spread the love.

Visiting the dispensary, Temperance ‘We’re-Practically-Outlaws’ Brennan and partner, Seeley ‘I-Was-Born-Ready’ Booth question Dr. Burke and the security guard, Carl ‘She’s-Just-Not-Into-Me’ Collins (Roshawn Franklin) who shows them security footage of a belligerent customer, droopy-lidded Adam ‘I’m-No-Dumb-Ass-Kid’ Caputo (P.J. Boudousqué) harassing Abby when she refused to accept his bogus medical marijuana card. Yes, you are a dumb ass kid, Caputo. #Turd

Through a combination of Angela’s sharp eye noticing handshake hand-offs in the video of Abby at the wellness center, and the case-cracking expertise of the resident forensic entomologist/botanist who reveals the crime scene, a secret Wildwood Weed camping/farming destination, the team realizes Abby had been covertly growing and distributing Mary Jane. Wow. That takes chutzpa for a little girl from the right side of the tracks. See, there’s a choice she never would have predicted five years ago, but there she was peddling the world’s smallest and most expensive enchiladas.

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Booth and Brennan review security footage of Caputo trying to purchase Marijuana with a fake card.

Once again Hodgins earns ‘King of the Lab’ distinction when he analyzes the crop confiscated from the camping crime scene and discovers–plot twist–that Abby was growing wacky tabacky that was a little light on the wacky side of the equation. What? Yeah. So … what good is that, you ask?

<<Related: ‘The Turn in the Urn’ Review: A Holy Grain of Compassion & Sacrifice>>

Actually, it’s fantastic–this Virgin Mary (Jane)–and here’s why. The strain Abby was growing was very high in canabidiol, the chemical compound that takes away the pain and swelling, but extremely low in tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the chemical compound with psychotropic side affects. As Brennan so astutely puts it: You can feel better without getting high. How awesome is that? #ReallyAwesomeForNonPotHeads

As it turns out, Temperance ‘We-Had-Sex-In-Virginia-Before-We-Were-Married’ Brennan figures out the configuration of the murder weapon and, together with Seeley ‘Clyde (of Bonnie &)’ Booth, who discovers Caputo’s failed career as a doobie dealer at school, fingers Caputo as the murderer. Case solved. Turd in the slammer.

Here comes the gold of “The High in the Low;” Here’s where this Bones review got the title, Some Have Greatness Thrust Upon Them.’

In 1601, William Shakespeare wrote, ‘Be not afraid of greatness; some are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them.’

That greatness Shakespeare spoke of is made in those squishy in-between spaces of real, unscripted life where who we are, who we will become, is defined by our choices. This episode of Bones may have been scripted, but the message remains the same.

Adversity inspired greatness in Abby. She took what life gave her and she transformed it into something that changed other people’s lives, gave other people back their lives at personal risk to her own freedom. Abby achieved greatness in this life.

Wendell’s life has just been turned upside down like a junk drawer during spring cleaning. He feels like he’s running in dry sand at high noon on a Floridian July day. Nothing is certain any longer and all he really wants is to not have cancer. He holds onto Booth’s encouragement to fight this disease for his friends who need him, and for that wife he’s yet to meet and those babies who are waiting to be born.

More than anything, he needs to know that his family will stand by him. So he makes a courageous decision to tell the truth, to share his burden, even if it means risking everything he has. To combat apatite loss and the torturous side affects of pumping cytotoxic chemicals into to his body, he’s been using medicinal cannabis. Hodgins, Angela and Brennan assure him that they don’t ascribe to hysteria fueled by ignorance.


“I can’t lie to you, Dr. Brennan. I just want you to think I’ll do a good job.” Wendell assures Hodgins and Brennan that he would never come to work while using the cannabis.

Not only that, Wendell, a young man who never considered himself heroic, finds himself on the receiving end of high praise from Brennan. He didn’t seek recognition; he didn’t expect it. When Brennan praises him, his response hangs in the air unspoken: I never wanted to be a hero, and certainly not this way. I’d rather not have this battle to fight, but with support like yours, I can see that I can do it. No matter what happens, I will make you proud, even though I’m so scared I can barely breathe most of the time.  

Never afraid to make the hard call, and though it makes her visibly ill to do it, Cam must put the mission of the MedicoLegal Lab ahead of Wendell’s need to belong and be employed. For better or for worse, this is what defines her.

Wendell is crushed. So, this is my life now? He wonders. This is how my story ends?

Hodgins and Angela punish Cam with the cold shoulder. Brennan boycotts the offer of another squintern for the case. Seeking assurance that Booth won’t abandon him, Wendell meets Booth at the diner in a heart-crushing scene depicted below.

Booth, a man defined by his faith in the system and his responsibility as a federal agent, cannot deny he would have to do the same thing Cam did. However, Booth, seeing Wendell’s floundering spirit and respecting his courage and their relationship, stands by his friend. In the end, it is Booth who pushes Caroline for an agreeable option to keep Wendell at the Jeffersonian while remaining within the law. When it comes to his family, Booth will always find a way.

Wendell and Booth

“Forget I’m an agent. I’m talking to you as a friend. You shouldn’t have been punished,” Booth assures Wendell. “I would never think of you as a loser.”

Wendell’s fortitude and honesty brings about his greatness, despite the fact that it was forced upon him. The wonderful thing about greatness is that it inspires greatness in others; it opens doors for others to achieve greatness as well. By having the courage and greatness to allow his friends to walk beside him in his vulnerability, Wendell gives each of them the opportunity for greatness … a greatness the power of which at this point they cannot even imagine.

Being great takes a boatload of courage in a world where people like to poke sharp sticks at anything that might be different or anyone who dares speak out. It takes moxie and commitment to be great. It takes that special kind of stupidity that expands our brains and allows us to believe we can do something that is impossible, and should do something that is not in our best interest … because it is something that will make a difference. God bless that kind of stupidity because without we wouldn’t have flight or penicillin or a way to communicate with people whose voices we may never hear, faces we may never see, but whose kindness and compassion could save our life or theirs.

Anyone who has risked scrutiny by selflessly giving the world a part of themselves, who has exposed their soft underbelly for the potential good of another person, has achieved greatness.

The evidence is clear: we have a lot of greatness headed our way in the final episodes of season nine.

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Next Monday, April 14 at 8:00 PM-9:00 PM EST on FOX catch “The Cold in the Case” when the Jeffersonian team investigates the death of a victim whose remains had been cryogenically frozen, Cam meets Arastoo’s parents, and Booth is up for a huge promotion that could uproot his whole family.  

(Photos courtesy of Fox Broadcasting)

To my dedicated review readers: As of March 24th, I’m writing for BuddyTV where I’m providing weekly recaps for The Tomorrow People. My first Bones op-ed article will appear in May. I look forward to chatting with you at BuddyTV and on Twitter at@MoxieGirl44 and @CatCabanela … And you know where else to find me.
Keep loving’ Bones!
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#Bones ‘The Woman In White’ Review

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Review as it appeared on ScreenSpy.com on October 22, 2013

Screen Shot 2014-04-05 at 6.58.55 PMDeschanel) and Booth (David Boreanaz) were eventually able to find and focus on the only things that really mattered: that their chase was over, their ducks were lined up, and their vows were delivered. In doing so without breaking out of character or skimping on substance and humor, Bones fulfilled on the ambitious pinkie swear made months ago by the executive producers; a promise that the fans would get the wedding they wanted, but in a way that only Bones could do it. When there’s this much hoopla surrounding a coupling—including an obnoxious number of previews, spoilers, interviews, and still shots—there are bound to be disappointments, right? Fine, but so much was done right in ‘The Woman in White’ that focusing on the picayune would be, well, petty.

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Christine Angela Booth at her parents’ wedding. The actress was uncooperative and her scene was cut, but she was there!

For example, we can digest the absences of Squinterns Fin, Zack, and Vincent Nigel-Murray (off making hot sauce, locked up in a mental institution, dead), but the absences of one Russ Brennan, Jared Booth, and Baby Christine were strange in retrospect. Not a complaint, just an observation. Next time you’re in an elevator with Hart Hanson, please ask him what the deal was with that, then come back and report to the rest of us. Here’s what happened, and what went well. ‘The Woman in White’ opens with a wedding rehearsal being interrupted by tag-team cell phone ringers. The practice is presided over by guest star straight man and Emily Deschanel’s real life husband, David Hornsby, playing Father Harrow. Yeah, that took chutzpa. Despite skepticism (by yours truly) that Hornsby’s presence could derail the ambiance of this long anticipated make-believe marriage, the actors used the absurdity of the situation as a point of humor, turning what could have been awkward for all into a delightfully amusing farce. The practice put on hold, Booth encourages the team to keep Brennan busy with the decades-old remains of an unidentified female while he picks up Parker (Ty Panitz) from the airport, discovers Max’s (Ryan O’Neil) muddy satchel full of suspicious greenbacks, meets with Aldo ‘If-Anyone-Has-Any-Objections-Keep-Them-To-Yourself’ Clemens at the church, and lights a candle in Christine Brennan’s name. Meanwhile, Hodgins (TJ Thyne) starts a pool on when the nuptials will be cancelled, Angela (Michaela Conlin) presents Brennan with a old, borrowed, and blue Parisian hairpin to wear at the wedding, and Brennan callously blows her off as she single-mindedly focuses on the case despite various stages of undress, wet nail polish, and a head full of saucer-sized curlers.

Brennan and Booth listen to loving speeches in their name from their parents.

Brennan and Booth listen to their parents’  loving toasts to their union.

Brennan’s floundering awkwardness during these scenes are highly uncomfortable to watch until you understand what’s going on. However, we have seen time and again that this is the behavior Brennan reverts to in times of intense duress. In season eight’s ‘Partners in the Divorce’, Brennan and Booth didn’t just banter as usual; Brennan froze while they fought like Rottweiler’s as they tried unsuccessfully to reconnect after her stint as a fugitive. Ouch. Most recently in ‘The Secret in the Proposal’, we saw Brennan and Booth at odds in the wake of Booth’s marriage jilt, with no clear way to put an end to the cycle of destruction. In then end, just when you think all is lost, the wonderful happens, and the two come together and recommit to their faith in each other. In ‘The Woman in White’ Brennan’s stilted behavior at the lab borders on being forced and ridiculous until Angela confronts her—God bless Angela. Brennan emotionally confesses to Angela that her feelings about the wedding are overwhelming and confusing, but the case is something she understands, and that’s why she keeps going back to it. And now we understand. The air cleared, Brennan mounts the laboratory platform, performs a cursory inspection of the remains, delivers several commands, and goes off with Angela to do girlie wedding stuff. Angela is touched, of course, and all is right with the world. That is, until the church burns to the ground, Parker spills Chicken Con Carne (?) all over his tux, the wedding is postponed, and Brennan goes back to working on the case.

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Booth looking dapper in his wedding tux.

It wouldn’t have been Bones without the crime quadrafecta: unrecognizable remains, a mysterious cause of death, a surprising motive, and an ill-fated killer. It would have been easy to skimp on the science with so much else at stake, but the details and delivery of the case’s progress was impressively substantial enough to make it believable. This would not have been possible without a whole team of squints at the ready to attack the mystery. Enter Dr. Clark Edison (Eugene Byrd), Arastoo Vaziri (Pej Vahdat), Wendell Bray (Michael Grant Terry), Daisy Wick (Carla Gallo), Colin Fisher (Joel David Moore), and Dr. Oliver Wells (Brian Klugman). The sqinterns—called upon by Edison, Hodgins, and Cam to make it appear Brennan was not needed in the lab—provided a fair amount of humor as they competed for top dog distinction and bickered like a set of five-year-old brainiac sextuplets. This was also a good ploy to bring these recurring characters to the wedding location. Next comes a cosmically ironic twist reminiscent of the modest young couple in O. Henry’s ‘Gift of the Magi’. In ‘Gift of the Magi’, a wife sells her tresses to buy a chain for her husband’s cherished heirloom pocket watch which it turns out he’d sold to buy a set of hair combs for her. The message of that story is about the lengths to which people will go to show their love for each other, and how priceless their love truly is. In this Bones wedding episode, after the wedding postponement Booth despairs over being unable to give Brennan the white dress, the guests, the cake, the pomp and circumstance; all the fuss Brennan dreamed of as a young girl. Though he loves their everyday life, he knows how important it is to her that their wedding be an extraordinarily special day, not just a stop at the justice of the peace on the way to The Founding Fathers for free wings. Brennan, on the other hand, believes Booth’s happiness requires a Catholic Church wedding. Devastated over the unavailability of a church at such short notice, Brennan allows herself to fall apart in her office, giving us an unprecedented view of her emotional commitment to Booth’s happiness. Brennan and Booth finally come together in a tender scene where they each reveal they’ve been trying to make the other happy. Booth admits he’d be willing to wear elephant tusks and have a squirrel monkey do the wedding ceremony, (God bless that man) and Brennan says the only thing she cares about is that Booth is there with her (and she says she’s not romantic?). Angela, the quintessential bridesmaid and the biggest B&B shipper, moves heaven and earth to arrange to have the wedding conducted at the Jeffersonian Rose Garden. How believable is this, really? Well, Hornsby, er, Father Harrow is most likely off fighting figurative fires, but they have Aldo ‘By-The-Power-Vested-In-Me-By-The-District- of-Columbia-And-The-Internet’ Clemens. The food and flowers had already been prepared for that day, and Hodgins pretty much owns the building. So … yeah, why not? I’ll buy that for a dollar.

Max walks his daughter down the aisle.

Max walks his daughter down the aisle.

The wedding back on and the case solved, the squints are invited to join in but must dress in period wear from a Jeffersonian History of Fashion exhibit. This was a strange and silly twist, however, it answered the challenge of getting those people to the wedding within thirty minutes wearing more than street clothes or lab coats. So … okay … let’s overlook the oddity of this development. The vows were sandwiched between two slow-motion shots which added a creamy dreaminess to the proceedings: the walk down the aisle as Avalon ‘He-Sees-And Is-Dazzled-By-You’ Harmonia (Cyndi Lauper) sings a sultry version on ‘At Last’, and the wonderfully prolonged delivery of the first kiss as man and wife. The slow-mo was conducted at a speed which neither halted the progression, nor gave it a campy aura. I’m telling you, people, it’s a challenge to find much wrong with this episode. Perhaps a first time viewer of Bones would find the vows quirky or silly. However, the Bones franchise made it clear in their promotional materials that these vows were written as a love letter to the faithful who have followed the show from time slot to time slot, year after year, and who will revel in the words encompassing the journey that brought them (and us) to this time and this place.

Booth slips the ring on his bride's finger.

Booth slips the ring on his bride’s finger.

Not much more can be said to do justice to Booth and Brennan’s vows other than that they were perfect for who they are and what they’ve endured. There, I said it. Perfect. Booth tearfully spoke from the heart recalling when they first worked together and talked on the very spot where they stood to say their vows. He spoke of ducks and wars and serial killers and ghosts and snakes. His life’s smartest decision and greatest joy. And how the chase was over because they’d caught each other.Screen Shot 2013-10-25 at 1.22.47 PM Brennan read from the note she wrote to Booth in ‘Aliens in a Spaceship’ when she thought she may never have the chance to tell him how he made her life messy and confusing and unfocused and 
irrational and wonderful. Screen Shot 2013-10-25 at 1.23.32 PM So, there you have it, folks. Another very well-rounded Bones execution. For a show about the unlikely pairing of a sentimental cowboy sniper who believes in fate and angels and probably Santa Claus, and a brilliant exacting empiricist who vociferously eschewed the concept of marriage, calling it an antiquated ritualistic blending of familial obligations and property consolidation sealed by the delivery of one man turning over a woman to another like property, this was a coup well played. So far this season we’ve had five truly outstanding episodes. There is no doubt that fans will continue, as they have for eight years already, to follow Bones all over the broadcasting schedule, even to Fridays when that occurs on the delayed new move date, November 15th, 2013. Screen Shot 2013-10-20 at 8.13.23 PM Those who are up to date on all the promotional materials know that from the walk back down the aisle, Brennan and Booth live happily ever after … until Monday, November 4th* when Brennan and Booth go to Buenos Aires on their honeymoon and end up working a case with the local authorities in “The Nazi on the Honeymoon” (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. White1White2White3 White4 White5White6 White7 White8

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#Bones Season 9 Archive

Screen Shot 2014-04-05 at 6.50.36 PM If I’m gonna be a primetime tv critic, I’ve gotta get the Bones beat. I just gotta. That was my one caveat when I started writing for ScreenSpy.com in 2013. Nineteen episodes later, I’ve moved on to BuddyTV and we’re in the homestretch toward another nail biting Bones finale cliffhanger and looking forward to a tenth season (Hallelujah!).

These Bones articles and reviews, most of which were written during my tenure at ScreenSpy, remain among my all time favorites. Enjoy, fellow Bonehead!

Episode 20: The High in the Low: Some Have Greatness Thrust Upon Them”
Episode 19: “The Turn in the Urn is a Holy Grail of Compassion & Sacrifice”
Episode 17: “The Repo Man in the Septic Tank is a Constant Surprise”
Episode 16: “The Source in the Sludge Review”
Episode 15: “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother: Bones The Heiress in the Hill”
Episode 14: “Pulchritude and the Canuck: The Master in the Slop Review”
Teaser:9 Scoops on Bones Big in the Philippines”

Episode 13: “Dance to the Music That’s Playing: Big in the Philippines Review”
Teaser: “7 Teases About Bones The Ghost in the Killer Episode”
Episode 12: “Shadowboxing the Specter: The Ghost in the Killer Review”
Episode 11: “Angels in Motion: Bones The Spark in the Park’ Review”
Episode 10: “Brennan Lets Loose in The Mystery in the Meat”
Op-ed: “Bones The Fury in The Jury Editorial by MoxieGirl44
Episode 9: “Beyond a Reasonable Doubt: Bones The Fury in the Jury Review”
Interview with Stephen Nathan: “Bones EP On Brennan’s New Obsession, Cam’s Crucible & The Ghost Killer”

Episode 7: “Agent Andy Plays Hard Balls: BonesThe Nazi On The Honeymoon Review” Episode 6: “Two Ducks in a Row: Bones The Woman In White Review”
Episode 5: “Daydream Believer: Bones The Lady on the List Review”
Episode 4: “A Righteous & Riveting Takedown in The Sense in the Sacrifice”
Episode 3: “Make Mine Well Done: Bones El Carnicero En El Coche”
Episode 2: “You’ll Never Fugetaboutit: Bones The Cheat in the Retreat’ Review”
Episode 1: “Paradise Lost; Regained The Secrets in the Proposal Review”

PreSeason Interview with Executive Producers Hart Hanson and Stephen Nathan: “Bones Bosses Tease Season 9 Deaths, New Adversary & Wedding Bells”

After completing my 67th post for ScreenSpy, I joined BuddyTV. Keep your eyes peeled for my Bones articles there!. I’ll still be tweeting about Bones and the new shows I’m covering ad nauseam, so join me at @MoxieGirl44 or @CatCabanela if you dare. I tweet … A. LOT. #Truth You can find my BuddyTV articles here. So far I’ve written for Suits and The Tomorrow People, and I have some Scandal articles coming out in April. Who knows what will be next?

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#Bones Season 9 Fall Interview: Hart Hanson & Stephen Nathan

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Image of the Interview as it appeared on ScreenSpy.com on September 16, 2013

Screen Shot 2014-04-14 at 12.25.50 AMPelant The Evil Little Troll Caroline’s pet name for Christopher Pelant proves wildly apropos as the ‘evil little troll’ continues to antagonize Booth and the team.“Pelant figures in their lives quite heavily in the first few episodes,” confirmed Nathan. Asked how the team fares under the strain, EP Hart Hanson, Bones creator, added, “You [never] know for sure if Pelant is watching … and the sheer possibility makes [everyone] … paranoid.”

As trouble in paradise brews to a roiling boil precipitated by Booth’s unexplained jilt, a palpable pall descends upon the entire team. Booth’s relationships with team members is strained, to say the least, but none more devastatingly than between him and Angela, the quintessential B&B shipper. With a nod to Irving Berlin’s cautionary lyrics in ‘Sisters, Sisters,’ Hansen warned, Don’t step between sisters… [they] are relentless and they will defend a friend to the death.”  The seemingly irreparable rift isgoing to take a while to play out,” explained Hansen, “because hurtful things [are] said and they don’t immediately fix themselves.”

If there is to be a wedding in episode six, there must first be a reckoning, we are assured. As such, Pelant’s reign of terror is not long for this world, according to Hanson who made it clear that “—we’re doing that fairly quickly; we’re not teasing this out through the whole season.” Nathan confirmed by further adding, “—we’re close to resolving it, but not in the way that everybody expects.” Pelant becomes more maniacal than ever before. Whenever they think they know what Pelant is doing, they’re thrown a curveball. We will see him in a way we haven’t before, [resulting in a] far more intense episode — it will be them confronting him in a way we haven’t see before.”

One last note about Pelant’s reign of terror—he may be killing off a recurring character before he’s through. About Booth’s confessor, Hanson had this to say:  Aldo Clemens (Mather Zickel), is an appealing guy—with a vibe nobody else on Bones has. I think you’ll see in the first episode, he has pretty good chemistry with both David and Emily. We’ll have him back a few times, which I shouldn’t say, because there’s always the chance that people could be killed by Pelant; so—now I kind of let that cat out of the bag.”

Tony and Roxie Reprisal

While Brennan and Booth struggle with their faltering post-jilt relationship, Roxie and Tony are resurrected. What they’re doing is going to a marriage counseling retreat, which is ironic since they’re not married, and they have this issue hanging over them,” chortled Hart, explaining. “It’s a hilarious situation they’re in,” said Nathan, chiming in. Viewers are used to the comedic genius of Boreanaz+Deschanel, but, admits Hanson, “David and Emily love doing Roxie and Tony so much that it’s a little disturbing!”

In ‘The Cheat in the Retreat’ starring John Ratzenberger (Cheers), Hanson dished, “Tony and Roxie are louder than Brennan and Booth, so they get to work out some [relationship] stuff undercover while trying to catch a murderer.” Added Nathan, “Their mouths are uncensored!” (And the crowd cheers) “Roxie and Tony get to a lot of things that Booth and Brennan might not get to!” Buckle your seatbelts, folks. This promises to be good fun.

The Highly Anticipated Nuptials And Honeymoon

After eight seasons and 166 episodes of trials and tribulations, “—we put a lot of effort into giving the audience what they want, which is a wedding in a way they don’t expect,” explained Hanson. Why not build all season and then go out with a big fat Bones-y piñata like every other show on television ever? Stephen Nathan took the reigns on this question. “Booth and Brennan getting married is a natural extension of their evolving relationship.” Added Hansen, “just because you get married doesn’t mean that everything goes simply.” The plan post-nuptials, Nathan explained, is to“put them in the most extreme situations we possibly could for the remainder of the year to test that relationship—murders we’ve never seen before—crimes, motives, clues that will test them— and increase the tension in that marriage—and see how two people [in] love will deal with that.”

Then the EPs threw us this bone about Brenan and Booth’s Argentinian honeymoon: “Buenos Aires has a certain history that demands ‘someone like Brennan’.” That from Hanson, then Nathan added,“And Booth!” 

What Nathan did reveal was that, “the entire country of Argentina is madly in love with Brennan’s books—and it takes a turn that even Brennan didn’t see coming.” Of course it does, or it wouldn’t beBones, right?

That is all Hanson and Nathan would say. However, revealed earlier this week was the title of the honeymoon episode: ‘The Nazi on the Honeymoon.’ With Argentina’s past history of sheltering Nazi war criminals, like Josef Mengele and Adolf Eichmann, after WWII, one has to wonder if a murder is committed in the name of keeping old Nazi bones hidden away in a suspicious porteño’s closet.  

The Ephemeral Successor

After a serial killer like Pelant, is there anywhere to go but down? Absolutely not! Nathan and Hanson admit that as far as villains go, “Pelant has set the bar high. We’re spoiled now!” Insisted Hansen. “The [next villain] has to be someone as interesting to us as Pelant was.” The duo teased a connection between Pelant and the new guy, who, according to Nathan, “—will loom over our people in a way we have yet to see on Bones. It’s someone who is far more ephemeral than any of our other bad guys.”

Your guess is as good as ours, Bones fans!

The Vomitous Detritus Bones Is Known For

Can Bones fans look forward to another season full of unprecedented grossness? You can count on it, according to Hanson and Nathan. If you don’t want to end up wearing our meal, teased Hanson, with a gleeful chuckle, “—do not eat during the first 7.5 minutes of Bones!”  There you have it, folks, we’ve been warned. “One episode coming up has … one of the most revolting things—and I say that with great delight and pride,” Nathan chimed in, “—that we’ve ever had on Bones and it has nothing to do with a dead body.”

Nathan explained, “We feel we’ve done our job if we have a lot of negotiating to do with Standards & Practices,” the network department responsible for the moral, ethical, and legal implications of program content. “The first time we were on after American Idol, one of our serial killers, the Gravedigger, was taken out by a sniper, and Her head exploded. That’s the worst thing we ever did,” confessed Hanson. “There were a bunch of kids watching.”  Whoops and ouch! “Usually, we have gross, but ultimately amusing things, [but] that wasn’t funny.”

Nathan clarified, “The thing that turns our stomach is when it’s a recognizable person getting killed. That’s not what we do; we like them already digested.”

The Creative Freedom of Survivors

After 166 episodes, Hanson and Nathan have earned the right to take some epic risks (as if they haven’t already!) “One of the great things about a show going into its ninth season [is that] people are with you, and you can be a little bit weird, and they’re often, I think, our best episodes,” Hansen explained.

In season nine, “we front loaded the season with things that we setup that we have to do,” Hanson reflected. Those include resolving the Pelant arc, reconnecting Brennan and Booth after a heart-wrenching disappointment, and delivering on the wedding promise. “The weirder episodes or the out-of-the-box episodes, are going to happen after Christmas.”

The final promise to their millions of anxious and devoted fans comes from Stephen Nathan: “We do have [episodes] planned that are ‘odd and unique’ and [not your] regular Bones.”

Final snippets from Hanson and Nathan:

1. It sounds like the move to Friday is still not set in stone
2. The wedding episode will feature Bones’ largest cast ever
3. Marianne Booth (Joanna Cassidy), Hank ‘Pops’ Booth (Ralph Waite), Max Keenan (Ryan O’Neil), and Aldo Clemens (Mather Zickel) will attend the wedding, but Chef Gordon Gordon Wyatt will not
3. Several long-standing mysteries will be revealed. Does the number 447 mean anything to you?
4. Despite Booth’s reticence, “Hodgins, who always wants to go undercover, or get a gun, or go out with Booth—has totally earned himself something like that,” admitted Hanson. “When it happens, it’s gonna be a big event. We owe the guy that.”

What did YOU think about what the executive producers have teased? Share your comments below!

Back to Bones Season 9 Archive


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The When & the How: A Bone to Pick (Unabridged, Unedited)

Author’s Note: The When and the How: A Bone to Pick is a fictitious alternate version of how Booth and Brennan’s relationship evolved romantically.  ‘A Bone to Pick’ refers to the case absorbing them, the catalyst for their processing of residual relationship issues from the previous year.
If you enjoy a fast paced, detailed and compelling case and a little (a lot) of romance, you will enjoy The When and the How: A Bone to Pick … or I’ll give you your money back. (All $0 of it!) I don’t own these characters or their universe. They belong to Hart Hanson.


Chapter 1: The Absolute Truth

Booth enters the diner and pauses, as if looking for someone. The lunch rush is winding down and the place is half empty. He sees Hannah sitting at his usual window table and advances slowly.

Hannah stands up, not knowing what kind of reception she’ll receive, searching his face for a clue. Tightening the belt of her black leather coat, she plunges her hands into her pockets, as if preparing for a brisk breeze.

Booth advances slowly and stops in front of her.

“Hannah,” he says, unemotionally with a nod.

For a moment they stand there as he appears to be weighing options. After a pause, he leans forward and kisses her on the cheek. Not a frigid greeting, but not a particularly warm one either.

Sensing now that he will at least listen to her, she exhales, realizing she hadn’t taken a breath since she spotted him through the window crossing the street a moment ago. A flash of memory recalling their affectionate greetings at this very café, at the bar, even at his office in the middle of the day, tugged at her heart.

“Thank you for meeting me, Seeley.” She grimaces, watching him to see what kind of mood he might be in.

“What’s on your mind, Hannah? I’ve got about 5 minutes. You are … looking good … as usual.” He says without smiling, and not breaking eye contact. All business.

She smiles, grateful. “Thanks, Seeley. You look … healthy.” Pause. They sit on opposite sides of the table. She takes her hands out of her pockets and picks up a rubber band she discovers wrapped around the salt shaker on the table. She fiddles with it nervously, then slips it around her wrist and takes a sip from her coffee cup.

“I have missed you, Seeley. Do you ever think about me?” Hannah doesn’t look him in the eyes, nervous about his response.

“I’ve, uh, been kinda busy.”

“How’s Temperance?”

“She’s fine, Hannah. Why’d you ask me here?”

She looks up, but still says nothing.

“You’re not rethinking my offer, because it’s no longer on the table.”

“I wouldn’t expect it to be.” She puts her hands in her lap, fiddling with the rubber band once again.

“I didn’t believe it was over, we were over, for a long time,” she says. “But then I had to face what I had known all along … that our relationship was a detour, but not the real ride. I never really expected it to last. We had a great present, but our futures, your future, was always meant to be with someone else. We did have some amazing experiences. But we were never a team, Seeley.”

“It felt real to me.”

“Did it really, Seeley? I mean really?”

The waitress tops off Hannah’s coffee cup and puts one in front of Booth. He puts his hand over the cup.

“Not for me, Liz. Thanks.”

Hannah fidgets again with the rubber band, slipping it on and off the handle of her coffee cup. She is obviously anxious, and trying to muster the courage to say what she’s come to say. It was a lot easier saying it to her reflection in the mirror this morning, and in her car on the way over.

Hannah puts creamer into her cup, stirs it with a spoon, takes a sip. Puts the cup back on the table and takes a sharp breath in. Here goes nothing.

Booth just looks at Hannah, not yet sure where this is going.

“How are things at the Jeffersonian? I assume you and Temperance finally have the chance to be together?”

“It’s complicated,” he answers as he looks out the window. This is going slow, but he can tell there’s something she’s working up to, though she’s having trouble getting to it. He decides to wait her out, but not for too long.

Hannah looks at him and slowly nods, as if she’s assessing what exactly that might mean. Has he moved on from Temperance?

Facing her once again, Booth says, “Listen Hannah, when you called, it sounded like you had something you wanted to talk about.”

“I did. I do. I wanted to find out how you are. We haven’t seen each other since, you know, the night I moved out.”

Booth lets out an exasperated sigh. Is that the most significant thing she remembers about that night? He had asked her to share the rest of her life with him …

“Yeah, I remember when we last saw each other.”

“You mean a lot to me, Seeley. I don’t want to just leave it how we did. I feel like I’ve committed an egregious crime against you – and you might never forgive me.”

“So, what? You wanna be friends?” He looks at her disbelieving and somewhat annoyed.

“No, Seeley. I’m trying to move on, but I … can’t until I explain some things. I can’t live my life knowing that I hurt the one man I came close to abandoning my independence for. You deserve more than that from me. I really did, really do, love you. Even though it will never be the same between us.”

“What’s with you people? If one more woman cites her independence as an excuse not to share their life with me … I will shoot her. No questions asked.”

He holds her gaze for a heartbeat, expels a lengthy breath, then softens visibly. Six months ago this would have enraged him. But he’s learned a lot since then.

“Hannah, I really don’t need you to …” he starts, then remembers Sweets’ encouragement to meet with her. “Listen to what she has to say – gain some closure.” Releasing the anger and pain of rejection had been a long process. “Well, what the heck … maybe I do.”

“Seeley, there are some things I want … no, I need, to explain to you.”

He nods, saying nothing, but maintaining eye contact. He doesn’t want to make this easy for her … but he understands, from personal experience, the need to unburden one’s self, to set right what has been wronged

“You have my undivided attention for the next (looks at his watch) three minutes.”

“I’m going back to Afghanistan, Seeley. For good. Or at least until there’s nothing left to report on.”

She lets that sink in. This is not what he expected, and it shows on his face. All of his defenses drop, which is exactly the effect she was going for.

“It’s where I belong, Seeley. I miss being in the middle of it. The important news is all over there. I just want to say good bye. And tell you … and tell you that I was always truthful with you. I loved you and I loved being with you.” She smiles, but her eyes tear up. She brushes a tear away quickly.

“I know, Hannah. I know,” he says, a bit surprised that he’s calmly participating in this conversation with the 3rd woman who broke his heart.

She goes on, “In journalism, there’s something we call The Absolute Truth. It’s the simple truth at the center of every behavior, every opinion, every good deed. Uncover someone’s Absolute Truth, and everything else makes sense. Even the craziest beliefs or motivations behind a behavior become clear.”

“And this is supposed to mean something to me … why?” He looks at her blankly, shaking his head.

“Most people spend their lives oblivious of, or in denial of, their own Absolute Truth. Sometimes they just don’t want to know. The Absolute Truth about us, Seeley, was that you were on loan to me from the beginning. I only had part of your attention.” She tears up again but this time lets the tears fall, reaching in her purse for a kleenex. “Deep inside, I knew that. And I was okay with it. But it didn’t include happily ever after, Seeley. It wasn’t supposed to. I understand that now.”

“Hannah – I was always truthful with you. I was in love with you,” he says, almost beseechingly. Then reminds himself to remain calm – there’s been a lot of water under the bridge since that night on the lawn overlooking the reflecting pool.

“Not really in love, Seeley. Your heart was always divided.”

“But Hannah … I gave you my heart – couldn’t you feel that? Didn’t you know that?” He looks away from her and out the window once again. He’s surprised and confused, frustrated … and sad that she must not have felt this back then.

“Just let me finish,” she says, waiting until he looks in her eyes again.

“I believe you wanted to give me your heart – but you have an Absolute Truth that says there is really only one person who completes each of us. And for you, I am not that person.”

“But …”

“I think having lost that one person, you were reaching for the next best thing … and luckily for me, I was in the right place at the right time. I could see your pain,” she says, pausing. “Men aren’t the only ones who have the “white night syndrome,” Seeley.”

“Hannah,” He reaches across the table toward her, puts his hand on the table, a pained look on his face. “You were never a consolation prize to me. I would not do that to you.”

She puts her hand on his, and squeezes it reassuringly. It felt … really good … to touch him again.

“I don’t think you would ever intend to, Seeley. But I think it happens to people all the time. You think you know what you’re doing, and why you’re doing it. But it doesn’t change the fact that you’re settling for something different than what your heart knows is possible.”

She pauses and lets this sink in for a minute, still holding his hand. She interlaces her fingers with his. She smiles compassionately at him, knowing that he does not see himself as someone who would knowingly hurt someone he loves.

“Hannah, I’m sorry,” He says finally, anguished. This is a truth he didn’t want to hear, but couldn’t bring himself to deny … because, he admits to himself, it is most likely true. He’ll have to think about it.

“It’s okay. It’s really okay. Now.” She smiles weakly. She straightens up, as if preparing for round two.

“I really was in love with you, Seeley, I still love you. And that’s the second reason I wanted to see you. There are some things that I’ve learned about Temperance that I would never forgive myself if I didn’t share with you … things you should really know …”

Booth’s phone rings. He disentangles his hand from Hannah’s and sees that it’s Bones. He answers, leaving Hannah’s outstretched hand on the table.


“Booth, it’s me. I’ve assembled the bio and abstracts regarding Dr. Enrique Larrinaga. You wouldn’t appreciate the complete text of his publications, they are quite scientific. But I think you’ll find this guy’s life fascinating …”

“Bones, I’m in the middle of something right now. Can I call you back in about 15 minutes?”

“Sure. When do you have to be at the airport?

“No later than 2:30. Can I meet you at the Jeffersonian in about twenty minutes, half hour?”

“Sure, we’ll head to the airport from there.

“Thanks Bones.” He hangs up and places his phone on the table.

Across the street, standing on the sidewalk a half block from the diner, Bones says, “You’re welcome,” looking at her phone, knowing that he had already hung up. She looks back toward the diner where she can see Booth and Hannah sitting at the window table, holding hands and leaning across the table toward each other. Booth looking very serious. Hannah, a little upset. She pauses, pensively, before turning around and slowly heading back to the lab.

Continue reading here>>> Chapter 2 How Did I Not See This Coming?

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#CovertAffairs’ Perabo & Gorham Dish Infidelity Fallout, Season 4 Finale & More

Screen Shot 2014-04-03 at 2.41.43 PMHow on earth will this situation resolve in the remaining forty-three minutes of season four? Perabo, the star of Covert Affairs who plays Annie Walker, and Gorham, her counterpart who plays Auggie Anderson, spoke about a finale bombshell that promises to change the whole trajectory of the show.

“A huge bombshell?” Perabo laughed. “There’s so many bombshells at the end of the finale. It’s pretty exciting. I certainly can’t tell any of them, but they’re both negative and positive bombshells that go off at the end, right down to the final frames of the episode. It’s amazing!”

“Piper described it pretty well,” added Gorham. “It’s such a good episode, a powerful ending, and it leaves things in a nice place to start season five.”

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Gorham agreed. “Auggie trusts her judgment. He’s been standing up for her and defending her since day one. He’s also been to battle before and he knows what it is, knows that there are no guarantees. He’s going to do his best to make sure that they walk out of there together. And like Piper said, what she decides to do, it’s not the ideal plan, but under the circumstances I don’t know what the other options are because the risk of Henry disappearing is very real. If we lose him here he’s gone. We’ll never get him again.”

“It’s crazy that we were able to follow him this far,” Perabo agreed. “When Annie decides to turn herself in to Henry, it’s in a kind of last ditch effort. And she, herself, is like the tracking device. If she can sit next to Henry in his car, or she can be in the same building where he is, and she knows Auggie is in that city, she knows Auggie will find her. And I think part of the reason that she feels like there’s hope still is that Auggie’s there and he won’t leave without her.”

Alone in Hong Kong without the backing of the CIA, Annie and Auggie are up against an entire Wilcox army. Can they bring Henry down without tactical support?

“Calder’s going to do everything that he can on his end to help Annie and Auggie succeed. What makes things tricky is he’s not sure what he’s flying into because of what’s been going on back an Langley,” Gorham said.

Calder took an enormous risk in participating in Annie’s disappearance and death. In that one act he chose in favor of  her crusade, though the swaggerific Calder has shown hesitation in the face of Annie’s sometimes off-the-wall methods.

“I love how the writers wrote the Calder character,” Perabo added, “and that he was a real, kind of, nut. He was not on our side at the beginning and then it takes a whole season for the three of us to become a team. I don’t know if Calder trusts Annie, but I think she trusts him. I don’t know if she always likes him.”

“Part of what’s interesting about Calder and makes him so much fun is that he’s not always likeable,” said Gorham. “But you know where he stands and there’s value in that.”

Being the only two in the know about Dead Annie Walking and still attached to the CIA until just recently, Auggie and Calder were forced to form an alliance.

“Auggie and Calder have discovered that they have the same goal,” Gorham said, admitting that the two characters do go about things differently. Eventually, they learn to trust each other. “I did something very deliberate when Auggie and Calder have this walk and talk scene at the World War II Memorial, and it’s the first time that Auggie has walked with Calder with his cane folded up, which is something that I only do with characters that Auggie trusts. I felt like that was him saying to Calder—without saying it—that I know we’re on the same side and let’s work together. I trust you. I think.”  When it comes to the their current situation, Perabo confirmed that Calder will definitely share his intel with the Campbells.

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Speaking of immediate tactical support from Arthur (Peter Gallagher) and Joan (Kari Matchett), or in regard to the Campbell’s future in general, Perabo and Gorham hesitated, struggling with what they are able to spill. Whatever’s next, it sounds like it’s juicy and fun. Listening to the banter was delightful:

Perabo: “Silence. Silence.”
Gorham: “I know. What can we share? What can we share?” (Giggling)
Perabo: I’m like, what can I share?” (More giggling)
Gorham: “Hide behind that question!”

Finally, the two effused about their more experienced counterparts storyline in the most recent episode.

“Oh my God! Can I just say I was tweeting while I was watching the episode, and that shot looking up at Joan diagonally when she fires the gun in slow motion and then you track down her body and see the phone in her hand! Those fight scenes in last week’s episode really remind you that Arthur and Joan are not just administrative people, they’re extremely high level spies. And they were field agents who were real badasses.”

“It was such a nice reminder of what great fighters they are,” interjected Gorham. “Arthur has been frustrated this season. He relished being able to take control and fight for his career and for his family and for his friends in last week’s episode. And then fight for his life after he’d been stabbed, or he’s crawling and trying to pull himself together and call his wife. I thought it was just gorgeous. And so I think what it sets us up for—and we can’t really tell you any specifics—but I think it ‘resets’ Arthur and Joan to the strong couple who are fighting for each other that we saw when the show started.”

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As polluted as the CIA is at present—what with Braithwaite (Craig Eldridge) appearing to be on team Henry ‘Hello, Ms. Walker’ Wilcox—and as incapacitated as Arthur is physically as well as professionally, will the Campbells be able to assist the Walker triad in any way?

“It’s going to be like Sly Stallone in Rambo,” Gorham promised. “There’s going to be slow motion and Arthur’s’s going to have a headband. It’s going to be crazy!”

As we guessed, Covert Affairs fans, we haven’t seen the last of the Campbells. Yay!

“Both Arthur and Joan are still very connected because of the positions that they’ve held in the CIA. As long as you can get them to a phone they can help. The fighting spirit you see in ‘There Goes My Gun” is a signal of how invested they are that this mission be completed.”

A failure at this point could be fatal for both operatives in Hong Kong. If not fatal, it has already proved transformative for Annie on many levels.

“Henry has been certainly the focus of this season,” admitted Gorham, “but the show, overall, is really about Annie and her career and her life experiences.”

“Part of the fallout,” Perabo reflected, “whether we take down Henry, or bring him into custody, or don’t get him at all, is what it’s cost Annie and Auggie just to hunt him down. Annie has changed in some pretty major ways in what she’s had to do to go after him. In playing Annie I think a lot about, can we get back to what she was before? And how has this changed her as an operative and as a person? And can she salvage her relationship with Auggie — (lead a) sort of normal life?”

Speaking of Annie and her life as a whole, Perabo answered a question about Henry Wilcox’s seemingly emotional (paternal?) attachment to Annie, and the possibility that there may be a connection between Annie and Henry that Annie is not yet aware of.

“When the writers created Henry, especially in this season, he and Arthur were always foils for each other. And the fact that we’ve never met Annie’s parents …  well, Arthur is sort of the light and Henry is the dark side …”

“That’s (from) Star Wars,” Gorham interjected comically, referencing both Darth Vader being of the Dark Side and reveling, “I am your father,” in The Empire Strikes Back.

“… so I think that they were often thinking of Henry and Arthur,” Perabo continued, “as sort of parallel forces to Annie, both wanting Annie to join their work. That tone that you’re picking up is definitely there because of a thematic feeling that the writers always have about Henry, and which side Annie would chose to be on.”

A major question on everyone’s mind is the surprising turn of events in the Auggie-Annie romance: Auggie slept with his resurrected ex-wife, Helen. Gorham and Perabo reacted strongly to this provocative topic, sharing some surprising insights into the intricacies of the lives of their spies.

Asked, does Christopher Gorham think Auggie and Annie can revive their romantic relaitonship after he cheated on her? Gorham had a lot to say.

“I have to say, I don’t think it’s quite so cut and dry as you present it. They broke up and barely saw each other until after she came back months and months later. Part of the reason Auggie argued so strongly against (Annie faking her death) was that even if she lived through the mission, there’s no guarantee that she’s going to be able to come back to their lives as they were.”

“We were on a break. It’s like on Friends. We were on a break!” Perabo insisted, defending Auggie’s indiscretion, likening it to the running gag initiated by famously faltering romantic sitcom couple, Ross and Rachel.

“It’s very easy and certainly tempting and juicy to say that Auggie cheated on Annie,” Gorham explained. “And I completely understand that kind of gut feeling. But I think one of the things our show has really started to explore is just how complicated these people’s lives are, and if the boundaries are different for these people than they are for an accountant and a school nurse who are married.”

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“There were a lot of things that happened that we didn’t really see on screen. Auggie had to call Danielle and tell her that she was dead,” Gorham pointed out “And I don’t know that that’s something that you can just walk back into, and therefore, by itself I don’t think it is necessarily a deal breaker because it’s complicated and at the end of the day, these two really do care about each other and trust each other. And so as long as they have that foundation I think there’s always a chance.”

“And I’ll say this too,” Perabo added. “Auggie is one of the few people in the world that Annie trusts. So it makes a relationship always sort of possible. One of the dynamics that shifted when Annie and Auggie were a couple was that they were the center of calm as the world is kind of swirling out of control around them. She had someone that she can share that with, where before she was kind of always going through it alone.”

Asked what it meant to their relationship that Auggie stayed in Hong Kong to assist Annie, Gorham provided the following insight: “Auggie cares deeply for her and he cares about the mission and he means what he says: I am here for you. I have got your back always. And I’m not leaving without you. He’s a soldier—Leave No Man Behind—and he’s not going anywhere unless they both walk out of there.”

The pair was adamant that their relationship is continually evolving. This entire experience has the potential to strengthen their relationship as operatives working together, and, potentially again, as lovers.

“Now that Annie has been going through this period of going dark, having to risk her death and being completely cut off, they may actually bring them closer than ever and make them even more peers than we’ve ever seen them. And I think long term, if you’re looking towards a potential relationship — it might open things up to go better should they ever get together again because they’re on more equal footing experientially, if that makes sense.”

Asked about the development of other Covert Affairs characters going forward, Perabo and Gorham expect we have not seen the last of fan favorites Eyal Lavine (Oded Fehr) and FBI Agent Vincent Rossabi (Noam Jenkins).

More intriguing, however, was the pair’s response to a question about Arthur’s first son, Teo Braga (Manolo Cardona). Fans would like to see Teo return. From what Perabo and Gorham said, it looks

like the fans are not alone.

“Isn’t he great? We loved Manolo!” Gorham offered. “Clearly we have a pattern of people who used to be dead, but are no longer dead. I mean Auggie has two fake dead ex-girlfriends!”

“Yes. We love Manolo!” Perabo agreed. “There have been deaths on the show shot in a way that we could not come back from in any way and I was then so angry. So when I saw the final cut of the death of Teo, I was really excited because I thought, you know, we didn’t really put him in the ground! That’s all I can say about that. And it makes me really have hope.”

Covert Affairs friends, you’ll never believe what happened when yours truly asked, “Can you at least tell us—you don’t have to tell us what the answer is—but do you know what the future for Teo is?”

Their response? A deafeningly silent six seconds of digital audio nothingness. You could have heard a pin drop, folks. #NoLie

Finally, there was relieved laughter, and Perabo said, “I can’t say. I know that I can’t say. That’s all. I know that I’m not allowed to say. Does that help?”

What do you think, Covert Affairs fans? I think we haven’t yet heard the last of that lovely Colombian mocha voice calling Annie, ‘Darlin’. What do you think?

So there you have it, fans. (Almost) everything you wanted to know about Annie’s shoot-from-the-hip surrender strategy, her continuing relationship with Auggie, Henry’s possible fates, the rest of the cast, and a finale that’s exciting all the way down to the very last second.

Piper Perabo’s final words to the fans about Thursday’s finale?  “I can’t wait for you to see it. I hope you like it.”

“Trompe Le Monde” airs Nov. 21st at (10-11 pm ET) on USA. Annie and Auggie work together to bring Henry Wilcox to justice while Calder returns to the U.S. with a win for the Agency, but Joan may remain his only true ally within Langley.


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#Bones ‘The Turn in the Urn’ Review: A Holy Grail of Compassion & Sacrifice

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Who can turn a case of mistaken identity into a tale of compassion, sacrifice, and the compulsion to protect those one loves the most? Bones can, and did, with “The Turn In the Urn” … all while showcasing three particularly extraordinary performances, several poignant messages, a completely different way to identify a murderer, and finally the oldest and most expensive murder weapon in Bones history: a 4,000 year old chalice.

Once again the significance in the messaging of this week’s Bones episode was conspicuously displayed through the interactions of the murder suspects as the case unfolded, and then cleverly mirrored in the subtle yet intimate subtext involving Brennan and The Avengers.

Though adding dimension to the tertiary characters–the squinterns–has been a theme this season, “The Turn In the Urn” used Finn Abernathy (Luke Kleintank) as springboard for three singularly outstanding performances. Emily Deschanel and Tamara Taylor both shone gold in their executions of empathy and compassion in their scenes supporting Finn through his broken relationship with Michelle. Guest star Tiffany Hines, who plays Cam’s adopted daughter and Finn’s girlfriend, however, delivered the most heart-breaking break-up we’ve seen in a good long while.

As the messaging and these three extraordinary performances are intertwined, we’ll discuss them together in a moment. First, let’s look at the case.

Before our episode even began, the disgustingly bloated and nearly unrecognizable three-week-old remains of recluse billionaire Todd Mirge (John Sloan), a hedge fund manager, rare artifact aficionado, and benefactor of Brennan’s digs in the Middle East and Africa, were found in the locked safe room of Mirge’s mansion. Cause of death was assumed to be a heroin overdose and no foul play was suspected. As it was Mirge’s house, the Church Falls Police Department assumed the remains were Mirge’s and released the body to Mirga’s mother, Drina ‘You-May-Sit-In-The-Section-For-Whores’ Mirga, who promptly cremated her son at the cheapest mortuary she could find, and then took over his estate.

Brennan and Booth attend Todd Mirga's wake and are surprised when Todd himself arrives. Whose cremains, then, are hidden within the urn?

Brennan and Booth attend Todd Mirga’s wake and are surprised when Todd himself arrives. Whose cremains, then, are hidden within the urn?

Teased in the previews as a potential triple homicide, “The Turn in the Urn” focused on one victim, one killer, and one 4,000 year old murder weapon.

Related>> Check out our Bones Archive here.

Each of these elements are extraordinarily confounding at the outset as nothing at all is as it seems. The victim? Not Mirge at all, but his heroine-pushing concierge. The killer? Not Mirge’s felonious Gypsy mother, Drina ‘What-Are-Those-Horns-On-Your-Head, Pretty-Boy’ Mirga (Joanna Pacula). Not even Todd ‘I’m-A-Cocky-Bastard’ Mirge. Not even the poised and visually stunning Satima ‘I-Didn’t-Fence-the-Chalice’ Gupta (Anjali Bhimani), curator of Najjar Antiquities.

How the hell did this all happen? Well, Mirge had anonymously sequestered himself in a Costa Rican rehab center for three weeks to kick a heroin addiction … so he was MIA and assumed dead. Mirge, who uses women like paper cups and purchases multimillion dollar antiquities by proxy at the drop of a hat, also has his very own personal concierge and doppelgänger, a Mr. Daniel ‘Drugs-R-Us’ Barr. Yeah, a concierge, just like five star hotels have, but this concierge, or, lifestyle manager, is just for the one guy.

As a side note, Booth is predictably disgusted by Mirge’s entitled attitude and so are we. The nerve of some people (!) … though Mirge points out that the public doesn’t give the wealthy enough credit for their philanthropic activities, like, um, bank-rolling Brennan’s foreign digs? Yeah. Hm. He does have a point, darn it all.

Booth elsewhere is maddeningly fixated on seeing a Flyers game. He was goofy at times, to say the least. I about passed out when he picked up The Slaughterer’s Chalice at the museum. Time out for Booth! Though … this scene in the museum did bring back fond memories of another evening spent at a museum by these two, a night when they agreed that what’s theirs is theirs. And now it’s until death do us part. So, you go ahead and be goofy every once in a while, Booth. That’s how we know you are secure in your relationship.

Okay. Since we mentioned Booth, lets address some of his seemingly uncharacteristic behavior of late. This season has brought some startlingly serious events and themes. These Bones episodes are intense, rife with action and pregnant with passion and sentiment. More recently , however, we have seen a Booth who at times comes off as uncultured or goofy, as mentioned above. Silly, childish, you know what I mean.

We have to remember that Booth is married and happy now, content. Romance doesn’t disappear altogether, but intimacy brings with it a level of comfort that allows committed people the freedom to let their freak flags fly without fear of rejection or derision. One’s partner is one’s home (thank you, Brennan), one’s soft place to fall, the conferrer of grace despite one’s shortcomings. Forever and for always. Be it joy, sorrow, fear, rage, or bliss, this is where he can bring it knowing that he will be received with love. It’s a beautiful thing. Messy, but beautiful. 

That being said, Booth’s mockery of the 4,000 year old Slaughterer’s Chalice defied believability for his character. Booth has a great deal of respect for Brennan and her work. He may have kept that hidden for a while in their first season–though I suspect he did it mostly to goad her into proving her wrong; this is Booth we’re talking about and that is his superpower–but we know he has always respected her. That’s what was missing in the final scene of “The Turn in the Urn.”

What would have made more sense to some (me in particular) would be if Booth had teased Brennan by almost touching the chalice. If he’d danced around it, poking at it, always dangerously close but never touching it. THAT is the Booth we know. Brennan could have then flattened him, landing him on the ground from where we’d hear him weakly proclaim, “I’m O-Kay!” Just a thought.

I digress … where were we? Oh, yes, a case of the faux Mirge …

Turns out, the dead man is Daniel ‘You-Want-I-Should-Get-You-Some-Dope’ Barr, Mirge’s hapless concierge and drug buddy who was in the safe room, unbidden, stashing heroin for his and Mirge’s private welcome home party from rehab. With friends like that … Shesh!

So, the Jeffersonian team does all kinds of scientific mumbo jumbo and discovers that Barr had been shot two weeks before his death and, even more interestingly, had all manner of rare particulates lodged in the contusion to his occipital. Hodgins identifies these particulates–crystal, silver, gold, and narwal tusk–as those only found a thousand years ago and only in the Hetao Plain of Inner Mongolia. Wha? This points the team to the legend of The Slaughterer’s Chalice (no, it’s not a real thing), a rare artifact that had been missing for 300 years. What’s more, the chalice, once fought over by a dozen empires, dates back 2018 B. C. That’s over two thousand years before Jesus was in diapers. So – this $50+ million artifact was used to conk Barr on the head and kill him. Wow.

Evidence leads Brennan and Booth to question everyone, but no one is looking like their guy. Booth likes Mirge for the kill. Brennan likes Mama Mirge.


“You don’t know what a ‘retort’ and a ‘cremator’ are, do you, Booth?” “Well, you can’t name one player in the Flyers, can you, Bones?”

Plot twist … Mirge is brought in to answer for the gunshot wound and confesses to the murder after putting his face through several transformations that tell us he’s figured something out. At this point, Mirge’s actually becomes a sympathetic character. Maybe he’s not a complete douche after all.

But that’s too easy, says Booth, of the confession. Intuition is Booth’s super power; he knows a stinker when he smells it and Mirge is far too cocky and shameless to give himself over that fast. You go, Booth.

Hodgins uses a tube from Archie Bunker’s living room exhibit at the Jeffersonian and identifies 100 carats of micro diamonds and lacquer melted into the pores of the bone matrix. Angela identifies the combination as that from some million dollar finger nail polish she’d read about being auctioned away to three buyers including Beyoncé and Mirge’s girlfriend, Sarah ‘Brain-Surgeon-In-My-Spare-Time’ Metzler (Christie Ann Burson).

Related>> Check out our “The Repo Man in the Septic Tank” Review.

On a personal note, have you ever found yourself giving Bones-inspired advice to someone? Well, I have, and it goes something like this: “Carolina, sweetheart, if you ever kill someone, don’t hide it, call the police right away.” Thank you, Bones, for helping me keep my kids out of prison. #ValuableBonesLessons #Truth

I digress once again. Where were we? Oh, yes. The damning million dollar fingernail polish …

Herein lies the message about sacrificial and protective love. Though it seemed that Mirge had commitment issues when it came to women, he really loved Metzler. He figured out that Metzler killed Barr and took the fall for her. Sarah, on the other hand, was attempting to protect Mirge from the anti-friend and concierge, Barr, who planned to sabotage Mirge’s sobriety. Both Mirge and Metzler were convincingly convicted in their explanations. It was clear they loved each other.

In a more subtle display, both Brennan and Cam express their, dare I say, maternal affection for Finn as he mourns the end of his relationship. Brennan blew us away with her impromptu query, “Have you wept yet? Have you cried for your loss?” Wow. Motherhood, her deep and abiding symbiotic love with Booth, and, perhaps even her recent experience with Wendell have transformed Brennan into someone willing to address the complex emotional needs of those she cares about … and that includes her squints.

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Finn Abernathy, the squint on deck for “The Turn in the Urn” shares the good news of his hot sauce success with Cam.

Astounding as her bold yet gentle and compassionate confrontation of Finn was, even more impactful for yours truly was her identification of what Finn was experiencing as a loss. Labeling it such somehow legitimized his pain and elevated it to something that should be respected and mourned. People don’t acknowledge their losses enough in this world.

As Brennan pointed out, failing to process the emotions loss inspires is physiologically unhealthy. The body needs to discharge from the shock of amputation. Animals in the wild do it or else they die. Humans are the only ones who stuff, and swallow, and deny how we really feel … and that can have fatal repercussions. So, dear Boneheads, feel free to get down with your bad self and have a good cry when you need to. After the rain comes the rainbow. So bring on that healthy rain. #ThatIsAll

Cam’s ‘Michelle is better for having known you and so am I’ speech was beautifully and uncharacteristically intimate for this perfectly poised, meticulously dressed and manicured woman who, as a rule, prefers to keep things professional. It was heart-warming, and generous, and inspiring. Well done, Tamara, er, I mean, Cam.

Finally, we have Michelle. Since we last saw her in the year two-thousand-and-I-don’t-remember-when, this girl has matured and was stunningly beautiful in this Bones episode. As for her performance, it was masterful. Who knows where actors go inside themselves or what it costs them to pull out whatever it takes for them to deliver powerfully emotional and tearful performances like Tiffany Hines did in “The Turn In the Urn?” Her devastation and courage to a) to break-up when she knew it was time, and b) to do it so powerfully left me speechless.

Compassion. Sacrifice. Protecting those we love. These themes are not new on Bones, but the way they were served-up to viewers this week was exemplary. Thank you, Bones, for another hour of fantastic and meaningful entertainment.

Relive Brennan and Booth’s 9th Season by checking out our Bones Reviews Archive here.

Next Monday, April 07 at 8:00 PM-9:00 PM EST on FOX catch “The High in the Low” when the Jeffersonian team investigates the death an art school dropout struggling with Lupus, Wendell Bray returns after starting cancer treatments, and Booth preps for his FBI Competency tests.
(Photos courtesy of Fox Broadcasting)

To my dedicated review readers: As of March 24th, I’mwriting for BuddyTV where I’m providing weekly recaps for The Tomorrow People. My first Bones op-ed article will appear in May. I look forward to chatting with you at BuddyTV and on Twitter at @MoxieGirl44 and @CatCabanela … And you know where else to find me.

Keep loving’ Bones!

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#BONES Related: About Curtis Gillespie’s Hart Hanson



This image has nothing to do with my commentary except that Hart Hanson is in it … and I happen to love it. Articles need colorful pictures, right? Well, there you go.

Curtis Gillespie’s Eighteen Bridges article about Hart Hanson, “In Profile: The Populist – Hart Hanson thought he’d end up teaching college on Vancouver Island. He was wrong,” is so well written it makes my mouth water. The writing is rich and resonant, resplendent with words that fall out of the page onto your lap in a pile of colorful toys. And chocolate mousse. For this same reason, I love the writers of Vanity Fair … the articles are deliciously descriptive and impeccably researched … and lengthy. A veritable double latte of pop culture literature peppered with sex and haute couture-quality fantasies.

I am so green with envy I could piss myself. The ambitious swath of self-importance running through my veins would gladly sell my family to have the opportunity to write like that … or work in that world with Hart Hanson. He is to creativity what this writer is to the English language … a scrumptious once-in-a-lifetime kaleidoscope of pure genius.

This is my favorite paragraph so far …

Near the end of the conversation, the suit made a suggestion Hanson strenuously objected to, but which hierarchy and diplomacy compelled him to respond to with: “Okay…that’s an interesting suggestion…I guess we could always consider that.” However, as he’d uttered these words, he’d stood up, extracted his penis from his trousers and begun to whap it against the phone, against the cradled handset, against the number buttons. Nathan did all he could to contain his laughter until the call ended a few seconds later, at which point he and Hanson laughed so hard their stomachs hurt and tears formed. But then, as if governed by a switch, Nathan stopped laughing, his face suddenly an ashen mask. He stopped laughing because he remembered they were seated in his office. And that that was his phone.”
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#Bones ‘The Heiress in the Hill’ Review

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Image as Article Appeared on ScreenSpy.com on 2/3/14. TJ Thyne as Dr. Jack Hodgins

Screen Shot 2014-04-05 at 6.58.55 PMSecond, Booth did not succumb to Sweets’ interpretation of the sniper’s angst over Brennan’s sizable cash advance (it wasn’t an issue of threatened masculinity at all) as insinuated in the previews. “The Heiress in the Hill” put an end to the anxious-hearted Booth who twice allowed Sweets’ opinion to trump his own in matters of the heart, leaving him utterly alone and in a whole mess of hurt. No, that was poppycock and Booth knew it. #ThatIsAll

At first blush, the heavy-hitting issues in “The Heiress in the Hill” appear to be the dissolution of familial mythology by Hodgins’ discovery of an institutionalized sibling and Booth’s grapple with the magnitude of Brennan’s wealth. Upon finer inspection, however, a deeper significance emerges. The heart of the tale reveals itself through the details and, at times, what is left unsaid. Unmistakable, however, is the valiant theme of brotherhood.

The episode opens with Booth finding a $75,000 advance check from Feiffer-Listman Publishing for the paperback sales of Brennan’s last novel, Bones of the Lost. Brennan asks Booth to deposit the check, but he cannot as they have yet to co-mmingle their funds. Though Brennan’s practicality prescribes joint checking accounts, it’s insinuated that Booth is the one dragging his heels on the financial front. What’s that all about?

The sober tone of Hodgins’ subplot commences when he is visited by Dr. Lawrence Rozran (Robert Picardo) from Sandlewood Home, the in-patient mental health facility that, unbeknownst to Hodgins, has been home to his secret elder brother Jeffery for nearly forty years. Gone with Hodgins’ millions is the trust fund supporting Jeffery’s care, so arrangements now must to be made for alternative and continued care. As the only living heir (other than Jeffery) the responsibility falls on Jack’s shoulders. What will he do and how does he handle the news?

The skeleton of Heiress Lauren Frank arrives at the Jeffersonian MedicoLegal lab mutilated, doused in lye, and sunk inside a slab of dirt. The game, as they say, is afoot.

Angela uncovers that the victim, daughter of Highpark Software magnate Steven Frank (John Getz) has used her father’s encryption software to schedule a series of faux-kidnap texts designed to terrorize her parents into coughing up $3 million (or was it $10 mil?) so she can escape her tortured life of opulence as a spoiled little ‘permachild’ and run off with her Spanish tutor and lover, Mauritzio Rivas (Assaf Cohen). Once identifying Lauren Frank as her own kidnapper, two questions remain: how did she die and who was her accomplice?

The squint on deck is Mr. Colin ‘We’re All Going to Die Anyway’ Fisher who, together with Brennan and the Avengers, establishes that Lauren accidentally infected herself with tetanus by cutting off her own toe with a rusty fingernail clipper–Yow!–and was dosed with an elephant load of Penicillin which sent her into an allergic seizure severe enough to fracture her palms, heels, and the back of her head. The allergic reaction and the infection, my friends, is what ended Lauren Frank. That, and her own special brand of stupidity.

So, who was the accomplice? None other than Buddy Coleman (Joey Capone), the dog walker from Hoofers Woofers Veterinary who, coincidentally, looks a lot like he could have been Hodgins’ baby brother. More skeletons in the Hodgins closet? No. But Coleman will certainly be hidden from view as he pays his dues to society for conspiracy to commit fraud, destruction of evidence, illegal disposal of a dead body, and anything else Booth can throw at him. The defense rests.

As the Booth-Brennan relationship has evolved, so, too, has each partner individually. Though much is said about his influence upon Brennan, not much is said about hers upon Booth. The subtleties of Booth’s metamorphosis have been overshadowed by the softening of his mate’s more blatant oddities. From the show’s inception, Booth’s saucy nature and physical allure have made his character easily lovable despite his flaws. However, under the influence of Brennan’s steadfast loyalty and love, Booth has evolved from cocky, acerbic, mildly self-absorbed lone ranger to confident, privately vulnerable, dynamic leader and partner. Agent Booth, you’ve come a long way, baby, and you have the world’s most beautiful squint to thank for it.

In “The Heiress in the Hill” Booth shrugs off Sweets’ suggestion that Brennan’s significantly larger income is emasculating. Season nine Booth is more likely to be proud of Brennan’s accomplishments than intimidated by the fruits of her labor. What did I tell you? Booth’s lack of focus on the disparity between their incomes demonstrates the degree to which Brennan’s love and indomitable faith in him have sanded away the sharp edges of the idealistic natural order of things he’s always clung to.

An alternate explanation for Booth’s malaise touches upon something more deeply ingrained in Booth’s psyche. Booth faces the realization that through marriage, he has the potential to become something he’s always despised – a person of wealth and means. What is not shown in its entirety on screen is the cathartic release Booth undergoes as he discovers that wealth needn’t be anathema; and privilege needn’t be divisive.

Unencumbered by conventional archetypes, Booth embraces the mantle of stewardship and listens to his heart (That’s always been Booth’s super power, btw), which tells him to take care of those he loves. This is what is shown on screen when Booth’s metamorphosis is furthered through his effortless delivery of his and Brennan’s offer to help Jack and Angela pay for Jeffery’s continued care. Though Hodgins doesn’t accept their help, it is clear that the couples consider each other family.

Booth proposes investing the money in The Wounded Warrior Project. As a veteran himself, Booth seeks to support the physical and mental recovery of his brothers in arms who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder and combat/operational stress.

It was disappointing not to see more done in regard to Booth’s involvement with The Wounded Warrior Project and/or his own experiences as a veteran. Now that Bones has been officially renewed for a tenth season, perhaps a Booth-centric episode will materialize to fill this gap. By the way, did you notice that Lauren Frank’s remains were found at Antietam Battlefield Park where The Bloodiest One Day Battle in American History occurred? Brothers in arms, I tell you.

Though the discovery of Hodgins’ parents’ deception was a mind-numbing shock for the entomologist, the scripted reaction powerfully portrayed by TJ Thyne elevated the experience from tragic to transformative. Bones rejected the hackneyed trope of the disenfranchised, simpleminded sibling versus the outraged, privileged one. In its stead, they offered unmitigated grace in the message that it is never to late to love.

Amazingly, not once was Jack Hodgins angry with his parents (who were obviously very loving to both of their sons) or resentful towards his brother. In regard to dismay over not having known of Jeffery’s existence before, Jack’s only concern was that he hadn’t had the opportunity to love the guy.

Finally, through Jonno Roberts’ portrayal of Jeffery Hodgins, a man who suffers from psychitzoaffective disorder, and through the continuing character development of recurring squint, Mr. Colin Fischer, endearingly played by Joel David Moore, Bones makes it clear that mental illness is as real as any other life altering disease.

Jeffery was portrayed as bright, creatively gifted, and engaging; harmless to himself and others. One can imagine many compelling discussions between the Hodgins boys once Jack learns how to manage their interactions without incident.

In the development of Fischer’s character, the brilliant scientist who has never allowed his bouts with mental illness to define him, we see a functioning member of society who benefits the world with his expertise. His words about medical and (we can assume) pharmaceutical support were inspiring—Sometimes the looney bin is the right place to be, and I was grateful for it—and enlightening—Sometimes people look at you in there like you’d done something wrong rather than just having a disease.

Whether the mental disorder is a lifelong ailment like schizoaffective affective or bipolar disorder, an occasional bout or chronic clinical depression, or a situational and ongoing battle with PTSD, they are each as genuine and legitimate as diabetes and arthritis. Their wounded are deserving of our respect.

Bones’ principled message in this episode can perhaps be best described in the words of the 1969 song by The Hollys:

‘The road is long with many a winding turn, no burden is he to bear, we’ll get there, for I’m strong enough to carry him. His welfare is my concern. He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother.’

Be he a blood relative, a brother in arms, a fellow neighbor, or your best friend’s husband … his welfare is your concern. This was Bones’ message in “The Heiress in the Hill.”

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